A good friend and I were having a deep conversation the other day. He and I taught together at the MTC and he made the statement that "spiritually" we both needed to; "get back to where we were back then ". My comment to this was that I could not go back to that way of thinking, though it was a great time in my life with many cherished moments, there was just too much self loathing and ignorance present. Think about it, I was in a place that had the spirit of the Lord around every corner and yet by denying my core self I was so miserable that I found myself in the depths of suicidal contemplation on a regular basis.
Another friend, another conversation, another day. "Rich it's time to let your old life go, you are holding on to a past that has nearly destroyed you. The Lord has given you new direction and you are going kicking and screaming trying to hang on to what you know as safe. The problem Rich is that safety comes at a price. Without spreading your wings to fly you will never know what it feels like to soar". These are the words which came with great fervency of heart and a deep desire to see a friend live a life of happiness and fulfillment. I began to ask myself why it was that I was holding on tightly to that which had brought me so much pain and sorrow. Sometimes the pain of familiarity is preferable to the fear of the unknown.
May 2010 bring with it many great and enduring blessings to the life of Ol Rich. May I have the courage and tenacity to move forward with faith in a Loving God, and most important may I meet the man of my dreams and live Happily Ever After. . .
<--- If you happen to see this good-lookin Man of my Dreams walkin down the street take note and call me fast!
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